These 5 “brain habits” are taken from Neil Fiore’s book The Now Habit. He describes them as the “negative attitudes or self-statements” that differentiate Procrastinators from Producers, but I think it’s important to emphasize that our self-talk is really related to our patterns of brain activity.
To the extent we repeat certain kinds of self-talk over and over, we create a tendency for those neurons to fire together easily and quickly in the future (“neurons that fire together, wire together” is the underlying principle). That means we literally talk ourselves into a way of being and thinking and feeling.
So if a certain kind of self-talk isn’t producing the kind of outcomes we want, one of the tools we can use to “re-wire” ourselves for better success is our self-talk and attitudinal habits — what I call “Habits of Brain”. Along with the use of gratitude exercises and other techniques for changing our Habits of Brain, practicing changing these 5 Habits will go a long way to changing how you feel and think about your dissertation and therefore, your level of productivity.
So, let’s take a look:
1) “I have to”
The habit: Think about it. This kind of statement has an underlying implied ambivalence about whatever you’re undertaking. “I have to. I don’t want to, but I have to.” There’s a certain flavour of victim-think. “Someone is making me do this, even though I don’t really want to.”
The substitute: “I choose to“… fill in with some element you really are choosing. Make it a real choice. You are actively choosing to act or actively choosing to take responsibility for delaying or declining to act. Don’t just put it off passively. Make it a choice. Or choose to do it. But own the choice you make — do it purposefully and consciously.
2) “I must finish”
The habit: This statement has a focus on the future — and probably a future that feels somewhat unattainable at this moment. Or at least unimaginable that it could be done without a lot of grief. Focusing on the finish line instead of where you are creates an easy entrance for overwhelm.
The substitute: “When can I start?” Asking yourself this question does 2 useful things:
(1) It moves the focus to starting and to the current moment = starting from where you are.
(2) It helps you imagine the action of starting (where, when, how, what), which has also been shown in research studies to make an action more likely to happen.
One of the things that is important to emphasize with this strategy is that it doesn’t need to be “the” next step, but rather just a next action. If you spend time trying to identify the (one and only) correct next step, then you are drawn back to the image of the finished product and trying to focus on how to create that. If you relax and take a next action, you are progressing and moving forward without creating the anxiety around whether it’s the Right One. See the difference?
3) “This project is so big and important.”
The habit: Well, let’s just keep our focus on all or nothing, shall we? Spending time imagining how important a project is and how critical it is that it gets done and all the horrible, acceptable outcomes will arise from not getting it done only sends us directly into a loop of high anxiety and overwhelm. And that means that we are actively practicing linking thoughts (read: neural activity) about the dissertation project with anxiety, overwhelm, and avoidance.
The substitute: “What one small step will I take next?” Akin to the Daoist wisdom of a journey of a thousand miles starts with one small step, like the one above (nice pair!) this thought keeps us focused in the moment, on something do-able, and again helps us create and visualize an action — which makes it more likely we will take it.
Another substitute is to intentionally minimize the importance of the project. Move away from thinking about how important this is and how it must be Just Right to a place of “satisficing” — making sure it’s “good enough” (but not perfect or intended to be perfect). Remind yourself that your work moving forward from the dissertation will be even more important to your career, that never again will you be temoted to take the time and energy to strive for perfection — “good enough” works for mosts things most of the time. (If you doubt this, the dissertation is a fabulous place to start practicing! ;-)
4) “I must be perfect” OR “What will They think?”
The habit: The habit being created here is one of anticipation of criticism, even of failure. Who can be perfect? And who can reasonably expect to anticipate everything someone else may want a bit different? (And why should you, by the way, you’re the expert in this topic, eh? But I digress…) Worse than the anxiety these worries may generate, is that you are practicing self-criticism every time you imagine the horrible comments and feedback that may come from non-perfection. So even if They are happy enough, you’ve already beat yourself up. And unnecessarily.
The substitute: “I can be perfectly human” is what Fiore suggests. I ask you to also connect alternative thoughts for this one with the notion of satisficing (“It’s good enough to get the job done and move on”!) rather than maximizing (i.e., having to get everything Just Right). Another useful link to make is with the Growth mindset (“It’s ok to have changes, I’m learning”; “Challenges are fun - they stretch my mind and that’s what learning is all about”; or other variations you may come up with — do share on the Discussion list ;-).
5) “I don’t have time to Play.”
The habit: Yikes. Feel driven? Pressured? Guilty about taking any time away from the dissertation? This kind of statement will create that link, leaving you feeling resentful and obligated. In addition, it will leave you with a fully “discharged battery”, no time for creativity, and a totally neglected Goose that lays the Golden Eggs.
The substitute: “I choose to take time to Play”. I’ve capitalized Play here to emphasize that there are at least 2 ways to Play. One is make sure you choose times for having a good time in your life, to socialize, to re-charge your batteries, and to leave some space for “back of the mind” thinking that often gives you your best break-throughs at stuck places. Another way to Play, of course, is with the dissertation itself. If you don’t feel so pressured, you’re freer to try different things, expect imperfect drafts, and generally create enough raw material to edit it into a finished product. Playing will give you more energy, more self-respect, and, by-the-by, reinforce you for all that commited effort you chose to put in.
So what choices do we have here?
The problem mantra: I have to finish something big and do it perfectly while working hard for long periods of time without any time to Play.
The substitute mantra: I choose to start on one small step, knowing I have plenty of time for play.
And wouldn’t it be nicer for the rest of your post-Ph.D. life to build these kinds of positive brain habits than have to spend years undoing the ruts and looping of the problematic brain habits? 